Character

What this adds up to, then, is this; no more lies,
no more pretense. Tell your neighbor the truth.
In Christ’s body we’re all connected to each other, after all.
When you lie to others, you end up lying to yourself. Ephesians 4:25

So before I get started, I really need you to feel sorry for me. It is about 10:15 on New Year’s Eve, and I am blogging. It gets worse…my husband is at the fire station already sleeping and my child is asleep. I will welcome the New Year in sad and alone. Aren’t you supposed to be with the person you are with on New Year’s for the rest of the year? Maybe that’s not so bad. I could use a little more time to myself!

Anyway, on to character. I have been taught about character all my life. I think people get a little jaded when it comes to the word. Role models are known for their character. Commercials are made about character. Books are written about character. And we are always reminded that Character Counts! No wonder it goes in one ear and out the other. But the above verse focuses more on being honest, which is revealing character through actions and words. In Ephesians Paul is saying that we need to stop trying to be more glamorous than we really are. Who cares what you posses and how great your life is, especially if you are lying about it.

I mean, honestly, there will be no movies made about my time on earth, no tv shows about my fabulous lifestyle, and no books about my wisdom and charm. I will never be as cool as I want to be, never have the perfect house, clothes, etc. But my character can do so much more than those superficial things. I can teach my child how fabulous a life with Christ can be. I can show my husband how glamorous a wife who shines with God’s inner peace and joy can be. I can teach my 4 year old Sunday School class how wise a person who follows Jesus’ example can be.

As the author alludes to, don’t let the television, People magazine, or the internet teach your child about character. You must demonstrate and verbally teach honesty and integrity. Yes, your actions speak louder than words, but have a conversation about doing the right thing when a tough situation arises. If the cashier forgets to ring up something and you catch it, tell your child that Jesus taught us to tell the truth…don’t just hope they were paying attention.

Happy New Year and I pray God will bless each one of your families with amazing love, grace, and character, too!

Busyness

She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day. - Proverbs 31:15

Ironically, I finally sat down to read my reflection (which I was supposed to post last week) and learned that it was about "busyness." I didn't get to my post last week during the holiday week because I was just too busy... I'm sure that we were all saying that last week. It's amazing how quickly the holidays come and go. It's actually amazing how quickly each day comes and goes, which is why it's so important to stop and reflect on how we spend our busy days.

What keeps you busy each day? Work, kids, volunteer commitments, making dinner, household chores, prayer, church, talking with your husband... the list goes on. This week's reflection made me think about how I do spend my days. My husband and I make an effort to focus on Owen only for his last hour before bed and Owen loves it! Since doing this, I found that I don't blog as much, hardly update my photos online, have no idea what my friends are saying on facebook, and take weeks to return emails sometimes but I'm spending my time in, what I consider is the most important way, loving my son.

The reflection asks us to read Luke 10:38-42 where we see that Martha is so busy preparing for Jesus' visit that she needs a reminder from Him to be more like Mary... to sit at His feet and listen to Him. How often do we find ourselves so distracted in preparing for and entertaining visitors that we forget to enjoy them. The same is true with Christmas. How often we become distracted by the preparations for Jesus' birth that we forget to celebrate Him. We have a tradition in my parents home, to first wish baby Jesus' a Happy Birthday before opening any presents. What a treat it was this year to stop the busyness and hear my son say "Happy Birthday Jesus." Take a minute this week to evaluate what keeps you so busy and be sure that it focuses on honoring God and your family.

Beliefs

The gullible believe anything they’re told;
the prudent sift and weigh every word.
Proverbs 14:15

I believe this is the most important week we have read in the devotional. The quote is so true that beliefs are the foundation for your life. What you believe shapes who you are and how people see you. They are the difference between Heaven and Hell, for you and your family. No pressure, right? Exactly! I am finally beginning to learn that the future of my friends and family does not depend on me and my beliefs. Thank goodness! I am not good at explaining God’s plan for our lives or how to accept Him as your Savior. I am a sinful human, but I have the Holy Spirit in me to guide my words to my brothers, guide my actions in front of Parker, and help me to be an example to each person I come into contact with.

We are in charge of no one’s eternity but our own. But as the passage tells us, we can certainly help our kids understand our beliefs and teach them to listen for God’s voice. Even as small as Parker is (he just turned 17 months) we read Bible stories, pray together, and talk about Jesus all the time. I am helping build his foundation. I am a Christian today because my Big Mama always made sure I was at Vacation Bible School and set a good example for me.

I am currently in a Bible study that is reading the book Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp. The first few chapters went slow, but I am beginning to learn a lot about how to raise Parker with Biblical goals in mind. They talk about how the goal should not be for your child to be saved, but to teach your child the ways of God. This will shape their attitudes, their responses to tough situations, their important decisions, everything.

So start teaching your child about Jesus, google the words to those old songs you sang as a kid, and let your child know that there is only one person who loves him more than you do…God.

Inner Beauty

What matters is not your outer appearance – the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes – but your inner disposition. – 1 Peter 3:4

My last reflection focused on outer beauty while this week’s reflection focuses on inner beauty. One Southern phrase that I remember from my college days that is appropriate for this reflection is “don’t be ugly.” I always thought this referred to don’t be mean, rude, or hurtful – my Southern friends please correct me if I’m wrong. Thinking further about this phrase… being mean, rude, or hurtful actually makes you look “ugly” – giving this phrase two meanings, both of which dull your inner beauty.

Thinking further about inner beauty, and drawing on feelings of “giving” during the holiday season, I think giving the gift of love or time really demonstrates inner beauty. The thoughtful gifts -- the ones that time to create or require your loving touch -- are really most meaningful and allow your inner beauty to shine through.

How do we strengthen our inner beauty and allow it to shine for God? The following was a suggestion from this week’s reading: how much time do you commit to your outer beauty each day (i.e. hair, makeup, nails, etc)? Commit to spending the same amount of time cultivating your inner beauty. Consider prayer, meditation, giving… allow your inner beauty to shine because that light is the one that reflects God’s goodness.

Attitude

Since Jesus went through everything you’re going through and more, learn to think like him. Think of your sufferings as a weaning from that old sinful habit of always expecting to get your own way. Then you’ll be able to live out your days free to pursue what God wants instead of being tyrannized by what you want.
1Peter 4:1-2

I used to be a major complainer. I hated high school, then I hated my job as an ER Tech then an OR Tech, then I hated PT school. I complained about people in my classes, people in my sorority/campus organizations, people I worked with. No one understood what I was going through, and no one had it as bad as me.

I truly believe my attitude has improved since I have begun a closer walk with Jesus. I can’t pinpoint any other changes in my life except that I am now doing what I feel He is leading me to do. I am also doing it because He wants me to. It makes a huge difference to perform a task because you care about the one who asked you to do it. I loved the part of the reading where the author pointed out specific mom tasks that Jesus has taken care of with no complaints. He does understand and he has had it as bad as me. But Jesus was doing what His Father asked Him to do. Jesus has been through everything we have and much more. His love for God and obedience to God allowed Him to fulfill prophecy and be a sacrifice for us all. How else could we explain voluntarily being beaten and crucified?

Next time you are ill from standing in line too long (especially here at Christmas time), think of who you are buying the gift for. Think of how your attitude could help the person in line next to you. Think of how God has commissioned you to be His light. People who don’t know Christ don’t understand a positive attitude in a negative situation. You may not even be able to explain it…just be an example. That’s a start.

At home your husband will appreciate a positive attitude and hopefully catch on as well. You can both be an example of how to deal with tough times, even when money is tight and bills are due or the baby has been crying for an hour straight. Share your worries with each other so you can present a unified and positive front to your kids. And quit complaining, instead find God’s purpose in everything you do.

Appearance

Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile. -- Proverbs 31:25

Does God care how you look? Does God care what you wear?

The following quote from this week's reading provides an answer to the questions. "God doesn't care what style of clothes we wear or even if they match; but I believe God does care that we love ourselves enough to present ourselves confidently and so our families are proud to be with us."

I have always taken pride in my appearance. I think I dressed up every day for school from first grade thru college (or at least 99 percent of my college days). I always thought that it was important to have a clean, polished appearance. Does this mean I wore the best, trendiest clothes... far from it. I remember each year my mother took me back to school shopping and we only had a set amount to spend. I made the most of what we had and took pride in my new clothes.

The importance of taking pride in appearance was echoed when I went to college in the Deep South and joined a sorority. I heard comments that rules of appearance included always wearing lipstick (you never knew who you would run into in Walmart), wearing toe nail polish with open toed shoes, and never letting those bra straps hang out! These are thoughts I've carried with me back to my home in the North. As the reading reminds us, it's all about taking pride in our appearance.

Did all this change when I became a mom? Except for those first few postpartum weeks, I've tried to keep myself put together... and for the most part I'm doing OK. What about you? Could you use a haircut or new sweater to update your wardrobe? Spend a few minutes taking care of you... as your an example for your children.

Anger

"Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry-but don't use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don't stay angry. Don't go to bed angry. Don't give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life." Ephesians 4:26-27

Okay, so how appropriate that it is my week, and the topic is anger. I just finished typing this up this morning before I read the passage for today. So, I am going to share the testimony of my miscarriage that I shared Friday night. I was so angry then, and God showed me that the best way to deal with anger is to talk to Him…

I have had to learn to trust God many times in my life. I grew up in and out of church until I was baptized in middle school. Then we moved to Alabaster where I began to attend Westwood in the 9th grade. I went off to college and gave into worldly desires until I can back to Westwood, and God broke me down and showed me that I had to trust only Him. I began to pray for forgiveness on the alter each time the church doors were open, but God had another plan. He put the prayer for a husband into my heart. I really wasn’t looking for a husband…I had just read I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and I meant business! But across the county a young man was approached by a prayer warrior at his church who told him she was praying for him. He thanked her and told her he was doing well in school. She said that, no, she had been praying that he would meet a beautiful, God-filled woman. My husband, Daryl, and I had a date that night! God again showed me that He would give me a desire and then fulfill it…I just had to trust Him.

Well, Daryl knew that I didn’t really want kids. I don’t enjoy the baby stage, and God hadn’t given me that desire. We got married when we were 25 and okay without having kids until I turned 26. Then God gave me a burning desire for children. I thought about it all the time. I began to come up with a plan. The problem was that I was given a timeline of only 2 years of fertility due to my endometriosis. I was in Physical Therapy School that lasted 3 years, so I felt like my plan needed to be fool-proof. I printed out ovulation calendars and arranged my clinical schedule around getting pregnant. I would conceive in the Spring, graduate in December, have the baby, take some time off, and then start a job. Perfect…and it seemed that God was on board (though I hadn’t really asked Him to be).

We found out we were pregnant in June of 2007 with our due date in March of 2008. We fell in love with that baby from the moment the stick said yes! We went to the doctor that Saturday for confirmation and drove straight over to tell our parents. Then we told all of our friends, our extended family, my whole PT class, and on Wednesday I announced it on Facebook. We were having a baby!

But then I woke up Thursday morning and just didn’t feel pregnant anymore. Daryl told me it would be okay, and I wasn’t cramping or anything. So I went to my PT clinical in Tuscaloosa and was standing in a room of adults with mental disabilities who were painting each other’s nails when I began to feel bad. I thought it was just the smell, but I was cramping some by then. I went to the bathroom (I’d been putting it off all day) and discovered blood. I knew in my heart that I had lost the baby. I told my instructors and called Daryl. They drove me to meet him, and we went to the hospital. The doctor, who wasn’t my doctor, met me with a hug. I couldn’t stop crying. I just felt like my soul had been broken. They told me to go home and put my feet up. If it got better, the baby was safe. If not, I would know.

It got worse. I continued to cry for 3 days straight. I woke up in the middle of the night crying. My family would not leave me by myself…I was just so sad. But finally, Daryl needed to run to the store. I was alone with God. I told Him how angry I was. How it wasn’t fair. Other women who didn’t even want their babies had them all the time. I didn’t understand; this wasn’t part of my plan. But God changed my heart mid-prayer. Somehow I began to thank God for the short time He gave me to be a mother. I got to love that baby for a little while, and it was amazing. Top of the world! God continued to comfort me and give me strength through songs on Sunday morning and beautiful conversations together. He allowed me to show His strength to my PT class, many of whom were not Christians. He has used me to minister to other women who have miscarried. His Glory has shown through my very darkest day. His plan was so much better than anything I could have dreamed of, and I am a better Christian, wife, and mother for it. I just had to learn to trust Him.

Psalm 113:9 He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the LORD.

Ambition

First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. - Proverbs 31:17

Many of you may be more familiar with Proverbs 31:17 from the NIV of the Bible as it reads, "She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks." This scripture is part of The Wife of Noble Character, which is a beautiful description of a noble, hard-working, God-fearing wife and mother who is full of ambition to please the Lord and her family.

The word ambition is defined in our reading as determined, motivated, or even pushy. Do you consider yourself to be ambitious? How have your ambitions changed since becoming a mom? Perhaps as moms our ambitions focus more (or solely) on our children. When I first thought about this statement proposed in our reading, I thought that it didn't apply to me because my 17 month old is not involved in much yet but thinking again I realize that much of my energies do focus around my son. I schedule play dates, trips to the library, play spaces, etc. because I want him to have the most positive, interactive learning experiences possible -which can be tiring! Plus we all need our down time.

This reading was a pleasant reminder that God does want us to be ambitious too. We should continue to set personal and professional goals as well as daily goals. Think about one goal that you've always talked about achieving but haven't acted on yet and what can you do to work toward that goal. For me, I keep saying I want to do more with photography. I have a great camera and take decent photos but I want to get even better. Several months ago, I bought a video to familiarize myself with the camera - yet I still haven't taken the time to watch it. Watching it will be my short term goal. Perhaps next time Owen naps I will watch it instead of doing house work! I've also asked for one on one photography lessons for the holidays so I'm moving in the right direction. Use the ambition the Lord has given you to bring joy to Him and you!

Actions - Signals of His Love

"The good, the right, the true-these are the actions apropriate for daylight hours. Figure out what will please Christ and then do it." Ephesians 5:9

The verse in the book was printed from The Message, which is a bit different from my NIV. I think the information is similar. They are both saying that what other people can see us doing (our fruit) should be good, right, and true. If we would apply the last sentence to everything we do, we would never need to check our actions. Seeking to please Christ takes out the yelling at our kids, the ignoring our husbands when they make us angry, and all of the selfish actions we take part in everyday.

I have a 1 year old, and he doesn't really get my words. I can't tell him how he is disobeying and expect him to understand. I can, however, use my body language and my tone of voice to influence him. If only we would pay the same attention to how we act toward everyone. How did my tone escalate the heated conversation with my mom? How did my lack of eye contact due to some distraction leave the visitor at church feeling the cold shoulder?

I can't say that I agree completely with each of the mannerisms that were listed...I sometimes prop my head on my hands and lean forward when I am actually trying to pay attention...but the idea is to focus on the signals you are sending and those that are coming back to you. What pleases the Lord? Keep asking that question. We know that He was well pleased with His Son, so there is our example. Jesus spoke directly to people. He did not avoid the sinners or the sick. He put his hands on people. I really need to work on that one. Okay, so I am not a hugger...some of you know this. I'm not against it, I just don't do it. I'm still trying to psychoanalyze why, but that's a different issue. But I have finally come to the realization that other people are huggers, and it might be odd for them when they hug me. I mean, I live in the South and people here really hug each other. I don't want my actions to discourage someone, so I am working through that. I encourage each of you to take the 24 hour challenge and then continue to think about your actions toward your husband, kids, strangers, etc. Pray that God will reveal how you can be more like Him and send signals of His love to those around you.

Let me know how it goes and if you have any suggestions for my hug issues!

About Jennifer

I am blessed to be the wife of a wonderful husband and the mother of a fun-loving 17 month old boy. My husband and I enjoy an interfaith marriage as I'm a practicing Catholic and he is Jewish. I enjoy my position as a part-time Public Relations Coordinator for a home health agency. Thursdays and Fridays (and the weekends of course) are my favorite days as those are the days that I get to spend with Owen.

This past year as been quite the challenge for my husband and I because our son was diagnosed with hydrocephalus caused by a brain tumor. God has been good and has watched over our family. We were carried through very difficult times by the prayers of family members, friends, and strangers. If you are in need of prayer please do share your request as I would like to pray for you and share the strength that I have received.

Owen is doing well. His tumor is stable and he receives no treatment. I trust that the Lord will continue to watch over him. Although this past year has been quite trying it's also been a joyous time as we watched Owen recover, regain his strength, and meet his milestones. We are also overjoyed that come next May Owen will be a big brother! God is good - let's celebrate his goodness together. As mothers we are truly blessed to have the greatest gift of all, children of God.

I look forward to this year-long journey with you. Heather will begin with the first post on Tuesday.

About Heather

I am a 30 year old Christian wife to Daryl and mom to Parker. I spend half my days as a Physical Therapist for Impact Rehab in Calera, AL, and the other half as a stay at home mom. My husband is a firefighter/paramedic who is a stay at home dad when he is not at the fire station. Parker is 1 year old, and loves firetrucks, tractors, and football. He is extremely disruptive, likes to have all attention, and rarely stops talking...takes after his mom and dad! I am enjoying a truly blessed season of my life as God has given me an amazing extended family, a good job, a beautiful home in Calera, and the desire to serve Him.

I hope you enjoy the Blog and remember that Jennifer and I are by no means experts on motherhood...our journey has just begun! I look forward to experiencing the ups and downs with each of you. Please be sure to share any prayer needs, as God has given me the gift of a wonderful spoken relationship with Him. I would love to intercede for you!

Welcome!

Welcome to Morning Motivationals for Moms! Do you ever find yourself in need of a little inspiration? Would you like to chat with moms across the country who are striving to be better moms?

Beginning on November 1, 2009 we will be discussing weekly motivational questions put forth in Chyrs Howard's Motivationals for Mom, Inspiring You TO Be All You Can Be. There are no deadlines here... just join us when you can - once a week or once a month. The faith-based motivational readings are short yet thought provoking and will provide you with a little extra inspiration for the week.

You can purchase the book from Amazon.com at http://www.amazon.com/Motivationals-Mom-Inspiring-You-All/dp/1416572937/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1255020449&sr=8-2

Soon Heather and I (the administrators of the blog) will share a bit about ourselves and our families. Feel free to introduce yourself as well. We look forward to this year-long devotional journey with you!